Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts
Wednesday, June 21, 2017
[Special] Editor's Note: Virtual Vacation
The Temple of Trump is going on a hiatus from now until shortly after July 4. The primary purpose of this blog is to chronicle stories in an archival matter, so being around for breaking news stories is not essential (although we do share interesting news items out of chronological order, just for fun). If something beyond Trump's normal stupidity and corruption happens to break the normal news cycle, we may jump in, but otherwise expect about two weeks of "radio silence" from T o' T. May Crom bless America.
Sunday, June 11, 2017
Wednesday, June 7, 2017
Pop Sugar: The Meaning Behind Donald Trump's Too-Long, Usually Red, Sometimes Scotch-Taped Ties
As First Lady Melania Trump's powder-blue, Ralph Lauren-designed homage to Jackie Kennedy-era style spawned hundreds of tweets, blog posts, and cable-news analyses on Inauguration Day, other eagle-eyed observers turned their attention to President Donald Trump's own sartorial choices. Specifically, they looked to a photo of Trump on the White House steps, which appeared to reveal a hastily applied line of Scotch Tape holding his tie together as the wind swept it over his shoulder. It wasn't the first time Trump appeared to have used the trick; in December, while exiting a plane, the trusty adhesive was again clearly visible on the back of his necktie.
Trump's style (or lack thereof, depending on who you ask) has been one of the most identifiable, if confounding, things about him in the more than 30 years he's been in the public eye. There's that hair, the jarringly uneven skin tone — is it makeup? self-tanner? — and the rarity with which he's ever spotted in public wearing anything other than a suit, usually boxy and navy blue. His choice of tie may be one of the most central and revealing aspects of that style. The man has not only shilled his own line of Chinese-made neckties, but he also has made the red, wide tie — dangling precariously low over his belt buckle and almost always Windsor knotted too tightly at the throat — his signature.
* * *
It's specifically this long-and-low habit that seems to irritate style critics — both armchair and professional — the most when it comes to Trump's choice in neckwear. "In an ideal world, getting the tip to lie at the waist of his trousers would be a plus," said Duncan Quinn, founder and creative director of his eponymous line of sharply tailored, boldly patterned suiting. "But that should probably come a distant second to global warming, war, and many other more important issues."
Of course it should. But might it still matter a little? First ladies in America have always borne the brunt of attention for their outfits and personal style, revealing an underlying sexism at work; people like to insist that fashion is fluffy, superficial, and of no matter and therefore the exclusive realm of women. However, certain presidents have also earned scrutiny and celebration over their manner of dress, proving that humanity has a tacit understanding that clothes send messages, broadcast traditions, and reflect personalities, no matter the gender of their wearer.
Who could forget President Barack Obama's dad jeans, which were necessarily tangled up with his image as family-man-in-chief? Bill Clinton, our flirtatious, sex-scandalous president, and his excessively short running shorts? Ronald Reagan, the movie-star-turned-POTUS, with his signature cowboy hat mirroring both his movie-star rakishness and his critics' accusations that he was simply an actor playing at president?
If Trump's necktie is his own stylistic signature, as our pop culture portrayals of him seem to have already established, its main messages may be of aggression, stubbornness, and power. It's red, a color associated with strength, violence, and wealth. Its length and width are boldly out of step with the fashions of the day. And its Scotch Tape trick is especially perplexing; experts wonder why he doesn't just wear a tie bar if he's so concerned about looking undone. Trump, a voracious viewer of TV news and articles and tweets about himself, must have seen the internet's mocking reaction to his tie-taping the first time people spotted it. But he clearly chose to keep using it anyway. The continuing habit points to a certain obsession with appearance . . . alongside a real carelessness about being caught being so obsessed with appearance. It speaks to both a deep vanity and a lack of self-awareness — a combination reinforced by some of his other bizarre personal grooming habits.
Tuesday, March 21, 2017
Rolling Stone: The Radical Crusade of Mike Pence
By Stephen Rodrick:
Pence is the nation's 48th vice president. Nine vice presidents have assumed the presidency as a result of death or resignation. That's a 19 percent ascendancy rate. Between Trump's trigger-happy Twitter persona, the ethical nightmare of his business empire, his KFC addiction and possible entanglements with Vladimir Putin, I'd say the chances for Mike Pence are more than 50-50.
During my travels across the self-proclaimed Crossroads of America, I learned that Mike Pence had once paid his mortgage with campaign funds, dragged his feet during an HIV epidemic and a lead-poisoning outbreak, signed an anti-gay-rights bill that nearly cost Indiana millions of dollars, lost his mind on national TV with George Stephanopoulos, and turned away Syrian refugees in an unconstitutional ploy laughed out of federal court. And he ended his gubernatorial term unpopular enough that his re-election bid in a Republican state seemed dicey at best.
So what do we know about Pence? The governor benefited greatly from the wall-to-wall "Trump is a crazy monkey throwing feces" media coverage during the fall campaign, in that his record was undercovered, but it's out there and suggests that his impact as vice president will screw African-Americans, women, the poor and any other square peg in round America. His concerns for the parts of Indiana outside his comfort zone toggled between disinterest and disdain.
And here's the frightening thing: Unlike his boss, Mike Pence has an actual ideology. Pence proclaimed at the 2016 GOP convention that "I am a Christian, a conservative and a Republican, in that order." However, his actual record – including turning down up to $80 million in federal pre-K funding – is the antithesis of Jesus' "whatever you do for one of the least of my brothers, you do for me" theology.
Here's a quick story.
Here's a quick story.
While Mike Pence was governor, his relationship with the Democratic minority in the legislature was crap. Someone on his staff suggested having the Democratic leaders over to the governor's mansion for dinner. The table was set for 20, but there were only around seven in attendance. One unlucky legislator stuck next to Pence tried to make conversation, but found even at dinner she couldn't shift Pence off his talking points. Gov. Pence shouted to his wife, Karen, his closest adviser, at the other end of the table.
"Mother, Mother, who prepared our meal this evening?"
The legislators looked at one another, speaking with their eyes: He just called his wife "Mother."
Maybe it was a joke, the legislator reasoned. But a few minutes later, Pence shouted again.
"Mother, Mother, whose china are we eating on?"
"Mother, Mother, whose china are we eating on?"
Mother Pence went on a long discourse about where the china was from. A little later, the legislators stumbled out, wondering what was weirder: Pence's inability to make conversation, or calling his wife "Mother" in the second decade of the 21st century.
Saturday, February 18, 2017
[Special] GQ: Trump's Tie Is Held Together with Scotch Tape, Not Unlike Our Fragile Democracy
By Jake Woolf:
Donald Trump's ties have never been great, both the ones he wears and the ones he sells (which are often the same thing). We can overlook the fact that he uses a Windsor Knot over our preferred four-in-hand style, but the biggest factor contributing to his menswear fail is that he just ties his neckwear way too long, a good four inches beyond where your tie should stop. And today, we learned a very unfortunate by product of that sartorial choice: Donald Trump, the future president of the United States, scotch tapes the back of his tie to the front.
You see, because the President-elect doesn't leave enough slack on the thin end to reach the built-in loop, he's left with an unmoored sliver of silk that threatens his commanding suited man presence. And again, his solution is to use scotch tape, the very adhesive that's sitting next to you at your desks right now, to connect the two pieces. Sad!
Donald Trump's ties have never been great, both the ones he wears and the ones he sells (which are often the same thing). We can overlook the fact that he uses a Windsor Knot over our preferred four-in-hand style, but the biggest factor contributing to his menswear fail is that he just ties his neckwear way too long, a good four inches beyond where your tie should stop. And today, we learned a very unfortunate by product of that sartorial choice: Donald Trump, the future president of the United States, scotch tapes the back of his tie to the front.
You see, because the President-elect doesn't leave enough slack on the thin end to reach the built-in loop, he's left with an unmoored sliver of silk that threatens his commanding suited man presence. And again, his solution is to use scotch tape, the very adhesive that's sitting next to you at your desks right now, to connect the two pieces. Sad!
Saturday, February 4, 2017
[Special] Washington Post: Today’s Protest Signs are Sharper, Meaner, Funnier — and Live on Long After the Rallies
By Caitlin Gibson:
Demonstrators march up Fifth Avenue during a women’s march in New York. (Mary Altaffer/AP)
Wednesday, January 11, 2017
[Special] Donald Trump, Watersports Champ
CNN: Intel Chiefs Presented Trump with Claims of Russian Efforts to Compromise Him by Evan Perez, Jim Sciutto, Jake Tapper and Carl Bernstein (January 10, 2017) -
Classified documents presented last week to President Obama and President-elect Trump included allegations that Russian operatives claim to have compromising personal and financial information about Mr. Trump, multiple US officials with direct knowledge of the briefings tell CNN.
The allegations were presented in a two-page synopsis that was appended to a report on Russian interference in the 2016 election. The allegations came, in part, from memos compiled by a former British intelligence operative, whose past work US intelligence officials consider credible. The FBI is investigating the credibility and accuracy of these allegations, which are based primarily on information from Russian sources, but has not confirmed many essential details in the memos about Mr. Trump.
The classified briefings last week were presented by four of the senior-most US intelligence chiefs -- Director of National Intelligence James Clapper, FBI Director James Comey, CIA Director John Brennan, and NSA Director Admiral Mike Rogers.
One reason the nation's intelligence chiefs took the extraordinary step of including the synopsis in the briefing documents was to make the President-elect aware that such allegations involving him are circulating among intelligence agencies, senior members of Congress and other government officials in Washington, multiple sources tell CNN.
These senior intelligence officials also included the synopsis to demonstrate that Russia had compiled information potentially harmful to both political parties, but only released information damaging to Hillary Clinton and Democrats. This synopsis was not an official part of the report from the intelligence community case about Russian hacks, but some officials said it augmented the evidence that Moscow intended to harm Clinton's candidacy and help Trump's, several officials with knowledge of the briefings tell CNN.
Classified documents presented last week to President Obama and President-elect Trump included allegations that Russian operatives claim to have compromising personal and financial information about Mr. Trump, multiple US officials with direct knowledge of the briefings tell CNN.
The allegations were presented in a two-page synopsis that was appended to a report on Russian interference in the 2016 election. The allegations came, in part, from memos compiled by a former British intelligence operative, whose past work US intelligence officials consider credible. The FBI is investigating the credibility and accuracy of these allegations, which are based primarily on information from Russian sources, but has not confirmed many essential details in the memos about Mr. Trump.
The classified briefings last week were presented by four of the senior-most US intelligence chiefs -- Director of National Intelligence James Clapper, FBI Director James Comey, CIA Director John Brennan, and NSA Director Admiral Mike Rogers.
One reason the nation's intelligence chiefs took the extraordinary step of including the synopsis in the briefing documents was to make the President-elect aware that such allegations involving him are circulating among intelligence agencies, senior members of Congress and other government officials in Washington, multiple sources tell CNN.
These senior intelligence officials also included the synopsis to demonstrate that Russia had compiled information potentially harmful to both political parties, but only released information damaging to Hillary Clinton and Democrats. This synopsis was not an official part of the report from the intelligence community case about Russian hacks, but some officials said it augmented the evidence that Moscow intended to harm Clinton's candidacy and help Trump's, several officials with knowledge of the briefings tell CNN.
Saturday, December 24, 2016
Saturday, December 17, 2016
[Special] Vanity Fair: Trump Grill Could Be the Worst Restaurant in America
By Tina Nguyen:
Donald Trump is “a poor person’s idea of a rich person,” Fran Lebowitz recently observed at The Vanity Fair New Establishment Summit. “They see him. They think, ‘If I were rich, I’d have a fabulous tie like that.’” Nowhere, perhaps, does this reflection appear more accurate than at Trump Grill (which is occasionally spelled Grille on various pieces of signage). On one level, the Grill (or Grille), suggests the heights of plutocratic splendor—a steakhouse built into the basement of one’s own skyscraper.
On another level, Trump Grill falls somewhat short of that lofty goal. The restaurant features a stingy number of French-ish paintings that look as though they were bought from Home Goods. Wall-sized mirrors serve to make the place look much bigger than it actually is. The bathrooms transport diners to the experience of desperately searching for toilet paper at a Venezuelan grocery store. And like all exclusive bastions of haute cuisine, there is a sandwich board in front advertising two great prix fixe deals.
The allure of Trump’s restaurant, like the candidate, is that it seems like a cheap version of rich. The inconsistent menus—literally, my menu was missing dishes that I found on my dining partners’—were chock-full of steakhouse classics doused with unnecessarily high-end ingredients. The dumplings, for instance, come with soy sauce topped with truffle oil, and the crostini is served with both hummus and ricotta, two exotic ingredients that should still never be combined. The menu itself would like to impress diners with how important it is, randomly capitalizing fancy words like “Prosciutto” and “Julienned” (and, strangely, ”House Salad”).
The Full Story (December 16, 2016)
Donald Trump is “a poor person’s idea of a rich person,” Fran Lebowitz recently observed at The Vanity Fair New Establishment Summit. “They see him. They think, ‘If I were rich, I’d have a fabulous tie like that.’” Nowhere, perhaps, does this reflection appear more accurate than at Trump Grill (which is occasionally spelled Grille on various pieces of signage). On one level, the Grill (or Grille), suggests the heights of plutocratic splendor—a steakhouse built into the basement of one’s own skyscraper.
On another level, Trump Grill falls somewhat short of that lofty goal. The restaurant features a stingy number of French-ish paintings that look as though they were bought from Home Goods. Wall-sized mirrors serve to make the place look much bigger than it actually is. The bathrooms transport diners to the experience of desperately searching for toilet paper at a Venezuelan grocery store. And like all exclusive bastions of haute cuisine, there is a sandwich board in front advertising two great prix fixe deals.
The allure of Trump’s restaurant, like the candidate, is that it seems like a cheap version of rich. The inconsistent menus—literally, my menu was missing dishes that I found on my dining partners’—were chock-full of steakhouse classics doused with unnecessarily high-end ingredients. The dumplings, for instance, come with soy sauce topped with truffle oil, and the crostini is served with both hummus and ricotta, two exotic ingredients that should still never be combined. The menu itself would like to impress diners with how important it is, randomly capitalizing fancy words like “Prosciutto” and “Julienned” (and, strangely, ”House Salad”).
The Full Story (December 16, 2016)
Saturday, December 3, 2016
Thursday, November 24, 2016
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